Sunday, July 18, 2010

Lead Me to the Cross

The first year of our marriage was definitely a learning experience for both of us. I was so thrilled to cook, clean and simply to be a wife that saying “I DO” was nothing less but joyous. However, when the reality sat in, cooking, cleaning and being a wife 24/7 was at times overwhelming. There were days that I prayed asking the Lord to change Daniel. “The least he could do, God, is to take the stinking cup of coffee that he only drank half way, to the sink.” I could only imagine what Daniel must have prayed….umm…probably for me to stop whining.

Little by little my prayers have changed. Instead of praying that God would change Daniel’s ways, I began to ask God to change my ways. The desire of my heart was to be the best godly wife that the Lord designed for me to be, however my flesh often rebelled against the desire. The area in which I struggled the most was submission.

Seriously, have Daniel not heard the song about the independent women that were asked to raise their hand up in the air? Perhaps I should have accidentally placed the CD with the song in Daniel’s car, so that he could grasp the idea of independency and forget the definition of submission. But no matter how hard I tried to covey the message, the Holy Spirit kept on bringing me to Eph 5:22, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” Ouch…it hurts, because I was doing the opposite of what the Lord instructed me to do. And when I allowed the desires of my heart and not my flesh to guide me, the Lord began to transform me and my desires.

Transformation was not only intended for women. In my opinion, men have the hardest command in Eph 5:25, “Husbands, love your wives as Christ also loved the church”. Have you ever stopped for a moment and though about Christ’ unconditional love for you? I have, but my mind can not comprehend how He could love a sinner who falls short of His glory day after day, months after months and year after year. You see when I mess up; God doesn’t turn away from me…instead He keeps on loving me, unconditionally day after day, months after months and year after year. My husband is to follow the example. When I get irritable and not pleasant to be around, my husband is to love me. When my big mouth says hurtful things, my husband is to love me. When I do not look my best, my husband is to love me. Watching Daniel stepping in the role of a husband and loving me just the way I am has giving me a tiny glimpse of just how much my Heavenly Father loves me.

Prayer is a powerful tool in a marriage and can transform the hearts and desires of two people!

1 comment:

  1. I love your honesty, Oxana. You're very transparent and this is so good for inspiring others to learn and grow as you have. What a wonderful transformation the Lord has done in you. Praise God! It took me just a little longer than that to catch on to His best for my marriage and that it included my obedience. I love your maturity. Have a good night!